1. Stop caring (Too Much)

Really, anything too much is bad. Because most of the time, people end up taking you for granted. It’s one of those inevitable realities of life: every one of us has taken other people for granted ourselves. Unfortunately, I have been told that I have this want-to-please-the-people-that-I-want-to-please personality, and it sucks when people just blow over you.

2. Don’t mind too much what others (even people close to me) think of me

Opinions are monsters that hurt the most and that you have almost no control over. The saying that it is up to you to change what other people think? Bullshit. The human mind is very powerful. Bottom line is, try as you might people will think what they want to think of you. All anyone can do is to try and influence; a closed mind will not be receptive. Mind you, I’m not saying that you should be closed minded as well. All I’m saying is: when they think negative of you, an example in my case, being perceived as happy go lucky, some do not think of me as a leader. What they think will hurt, but if you know who you are, your talent and the way you take responsibility, then it doesn’t matter.

3. Me being first priority

Yes. It’s always good to look out for number two (God being number one). I have to tend and focus on my own growth, my own welfare and shove others a little bit to the side. Because life will fuck up and throw knives at you when it meant to throw lemons, and there’s a colossal possibility that you will have to stitch up your own wound without any help.

4. Expect that people will hurt you. All you can do is protect yourself.

People are not perfect. I am not perfect. Definitely I will hurt others as others are sure to hurt me. I had a literature professor once who described people as spinning tops with barbs of doom: we tend to hurt those who are close.

I’m starting to think that some walls: they’re not meant to be torn down.

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So. Having a jolly read?

*Le me will write about le (dare I say?) expedition in le next post.

ME GUSTA!

I’m on my break at work. Work has been stressful just now, so I’ve decided to use what remains of my allotted break and step out of the office building. So I blog.

Commerce has made time invaluable. The concept of time being acquired at the lowest possible price or someone choosing to sell to the highest bidder made it a commodity. A qualified person’s “free” time has become a luxury and and untapped resource. And once time rose in value the value of people’s well being depreciated.

The world currently runs on what I call the law of perceived equivalent exchanges. As long as an exchange is perceived and accepted as equal by both parties all other circumstances are irrelevant. An example: A certain amount of time is required to ensure the continued health of one’s spirit, mind and body. However, most offices only allow for a total of one hour break for the whole day, and most office buildings do not have places where employees can just sit down, relax, do something unrelated to work and not think of work for 15 minutes. They have those at call centers but then again their shifts are so shitty and their work so monotonous and stressful they do deserve at least that. And how do these seat-less people de-stress in the middle of the day? By smoking! Or by going out to the nearby overpriced convenience store to buy salty crunchy chips. I, the humble 9-6 employee am currently walking around and around my office block typing away at my iPod Touch while men whistle and shout at me whenever a car passes and my skirt sways a little. But I’m out of the office so hey!

It’s not like I don’t love my job. I do. I get excited for new projects and stay in the office long after working hours sometimes. But no job is without its own stress. As the older people in my family keep saying “Walang trabahong madali.” (There are no easy jobs.) Taking a few minutes off not only allows you to get back into what you’re doing refreshed but also breaks the pressure’s momentum.

Get us our seats or we’ll squat near the elevators while reading ebooks on our break!

Nankurunaisa.

To tell the truth I’m already getting it at some degree this early. There’s a definite stigma against single people who are of marrying age. Especially in Filipino culture where most people can’t even eat by oneself, people are afraid of being alone. Saying you’re single gives people this vision of you coming home to a lonely apartment, no one to talk to, nothing to do, home alone on Friday evenings and hating the world for not having anyone to love. Coca-cola’s marketing agency has even invented an imaginary group consisting of single people in one of their commercials late last year: Samahan ng mga Malalamig ang Pasko (Association of People with Cold Christmases). The person who said that he was a member was a teenage boy who just got dumped by a girl he really liked just before Christmas. He was seated at the family dinner table, surrounded by food, smiling siblings and supportive parents telling him that it’s alright, there’s Coca-cola. I don’t know about you but his Christmas didn’t look cold to me.

I do want to get married in the future. I’m all for white gowns and babies and together forevers. However there are reasons why marriage is not really foremost on my mind right now. And I’m planning on bringing an iPad (lemme borrow yours Roanne?) with this post saved on it along so that on I can show this list and not have to answer the same questions over and over.

1. I haven’t found him yet.

My husband to be that is.

Common sense tells us that we can’t marry just anyone. However, here are some reasons I’ve seen or heard of why people marry: 1.  their partner is “good enough” 2. they’re afraid of being alone 3. marriage is the next step in the process flow of life 4. loving being “in love” 5. even worse are those who get married for the experience of the wedding day and wear a Malou Castillejos gown. …OK the Castillejos gown is almost worth it.

I have seen some couples break up a marriage as easily as they would a non-marital one. People don’t realize the big effect of a bad relationship between parents have on their children. And everything: the heartache, the stress, the gossip by tactless people and the smug I-told-you-so’s was an exercise in futility!

Call me an idealist, but I believe that for a relationship to work, a couple must be friends. I don’t mean being friends first before entering a relationship, I mean a relationship where you both see each other as good friends. Think of your best friend: you wouldn’t deliberately cheat, hurt or lie to him/her, would you? And if something was wrong you’ll try your best to understand where he/she is coming from. And this reason in a nutshell is: I haven’t yet found that friend that I’m in love with and who’s in love with me.

2. In the meantime, I’m improving myself.

Sure I’m a pretty great person, just ask around!

Just kidding. I’m currently focused on enriching my life. Getting new experiences, trying out things, stimulating creativity, viewing more perspectives and just basically throwing the doors of my mind and heart wide open.

3. There are a lot of things I still want to do that I believe I won’t be able to once I’m married.

Hiking? Street and Travel photography? Getting three Michelin stars so that I can tell Gordon Ramsay that he’s a bloody brilliant arrogant sonovabitch to his face?

I want to do those. And I will not be able to just drop everything and go off somewhere once I am a mom and a wife. Starting a family is a lot of responsibility. You and your partner have to constantly work on it. You can have a husband who shares your passion, but both of your responsibilities are finite. All I’m saying is, better make sure that you’ve experienced jumping out of airplanes before you have a wife and kids who’ll suffer if your parachute is having a bad day.

4. Marrying is not everything.

Single and happy. Two words that some people can’t imagine being in the same sentence except when the word ‘not” comes before “happy”.

I’m saying it: if I become a spinster, so what? As long as my life is filled with faith and passion and loving family and friends I’ll gladly be the crazy fun spinster auntie to my future nieces and nephews.

5. I want to have a very strong faith in God before I start a family.

Because I, my husband  and my children are going to need it. Strengthening in progress!

Nankurunaisa!

Filed under: Percolated (sometimes not too much) Thoughts Tagged: happiness, lists, marriage, single, single woman ]]> http://peonyli.wordpress.com/2011/11/24/5-reasons-why-i-am-not-ready-for-marriage/feed/ 2 peonyli http://peonyli.wordpress.com/2011/11/07/living-healthy/ http://peonyli.wordpress.com/2011/11/07/living-healthy/#comments Mon, 07 Nov 2011 14:51:38 +0000 PeonyLi http://peonyli.wordpress.com/?p=1470 Continue reading →]]> I have been thinking lately that 2011 is the year that I consciously decided to live a happier, if not healthier lifestyle. It just that with adulthood (27 y/o. 18 y/o is the age of consent, it doesn’t make you an adult) it just made more sense to me to follow, well, common sense. I have found that living healthy is 20% effort and 80% logic:

• If you get sick all the time or if you’re always tired, eat more fish and veggies and at least a serving of fruit of everyday. Also, exercise!
• If you want to get thinner, it’s 60% diet and 40% how you exercise.
• If vanity stresses you out, get rid of it. It’s all insecurity anyway. Also the more make up you put on the faster your skin ages.
• If you’re feeling demotivated with your life, find your passion and pursue it. Life is too short not to live passionately every single day. Remember: Don Quixote may have been crazy, but I bet you the times he went after that windmill were some of the most exhilarating moments of his life.
• If you’re not finding time for God and your family, cut back from work or extra-curricular activities.
• If you’re stressed at work, take a break. It’s great for your mind and productivity.
• If you always end up spending all your money, get someone you can trust completely to hold your bank passbook for you.
• If you get molested at the MRT, punch that sonovabitch, grab his hair, and don’t let go until you get to the next station and report his lascivious ass to rail security.
• If you don’t know how to punch get boxing lessons. Very useful.
• If your starting to get varicose veins don’t wear your stilettos all the time.
• If you need instant ego boost, wear nice undies and great shoes.
• If you suffer from eye strain at times, wear glasses or look at the plant on your desk for 20 to 30 seconds. Don’t get rid of the plant even when the office tells you to, and tell them your venus fly trap does not eat humans who are nice to you.
• If you’re trying to achieve a goal, don’t put yourself in a situation where you’ll be remotely tempted. “Just passing through” a mall on sale when you’re trying to save is irresponsible.
• If bad relationships (with men) take a toll on your peace of mind, cut them.
• Better yet, in the first place don’t associate with people (men) who you know will just hurt you in the long run. Yes even if you like them.
• If you’re tired of the city, go to wildlife parks. It’s cheap, accessible, and for a few hours you can pretend you’re somewhere else.
• If you don’t understand, say so.
• If you want something, ask. Always ask. Know the power of a question.
•  If you don’t like something and it’s not that important, don’t do it. If it’s not important why are you forcing yourself?

Nankurunaisa.

The transition was fast, like movie editing when it just cuts into a new scene. In front of me was an emerald sky. It was a weird feeling going from sitting position to lying down that fast, or how fast it seemed to me.

I got up and looked around. An endless plain with hundreds of scattered plum trees. Looking at the plum trees I saw that they were different. Yellow blossoms instead of the usual pink. Pink with red veined leaves instead of green. Gold fruits with orange polkadots. Military green tree trunks. The grass and soil are the same color as the real world though. Looking to the horizon, I saw that the grass is greener, yet it made it look like the sky and the earth are connected. The only indication of their division aside from the slight difference in color are the grass’s movements to the comfortable blowing wind. I wasn’t bothered by the colors nor the place. I tried to think of words to describe the entirety but I only thought of the words “compelling” and “familiar”.

I jumped because I saw something moving from the corner of my left eye. I turned to face an elephant in a bejeweled sari walking towards me across the grass.

The elephant looked like a normal elephant except that she was, not, an elephant. Until now I cannot say what makes me set her apart as non-animal the moment I saw her. Presence? Posture? Grace?

She was wearing an orange sari. Opals and pearls were embroidered into the sari’s beautiful intricate design. She wore no jewelry save for simple gold drop earrings. She smelled of jasmine, mint and citrus. She walked upright, although why that was the last thing I noticed I do not know. I would have still thought she was human had she walked on all fours.

She stopped a few feet in front of me, smiled and said, “Getting a little strange?”

I said, “Definitely. Erm, no. Not really, I meant my being here, not the place.”

She nodded, her truck swaying a little with the action. “Of course it won’t be. This place is home to you.”

Laughing, I asked, “Where is this?”

She said, “Have you looked at what you’re wearing?”

I looked down. I was naked.

She said: “Now where do you think this is?”

“I-” Pause. I looked at the grass blades peeping between my toes and wriggled them. Slowly feeling anxiety I looked up and said, “I don’t know.”

Her voice was calm, but I detected disappointment. “You have let yourself be spoonfed. Allowed your backbone to curve around the mold.”

Her trunk lifted my chin. The elephant looked me in the eye. “You have chosen to forget what this place is, what this place can do, what you can do in it. Why do you continue to abandon it? Fear? Do not tell me that you haven’t yet found a bigger quantity of courage than your childhood.”

My eyes widened.

“You remember now. Tell me. Where is this?”

I said, “Anywhere I want it to be.”

Ang sakay ko pauwi ay MRT. Kanina, habang papaalis ng Araneta Cubao ang north-bound na train, nakaipit ako at dalawa pang babae sa may pinto, dahil ang mga maginoo at ubod ng yaman sa common sense na mga lalake ay nagkumpol sa may pintuan para madaling makababa. Alam niyo marahil na maraming bumababa ng Araneta Cubao station na pa-north-bound. Kung hindi niyo alam, ang swerte niyong mga anak ng Diyos.

Naki-”excuse me” ako at pinilit na makalagpas sa mga ayaw magparaan at nakatitig lang na mga lalake para umabot sa gitna ng tren na kaibigan ng may claustrophobia dahil maluwag. May isang mama na nagsabi ng malakas habang dumaraan ako ng, ”O yan a, yan dadaan ang maganda, BAWAL kasi ang mga MAGAGANDA sa MASIKIP, DAPAT sa GITNA para MALUWAG!”

Nagulat ako. Hindi naman bastos o sarcastic (ano ba sa Filipino ang sarcastic?) yung pagkaka-excuse me ko, kaya hindi ko alam kung ano ang prublema niya. Lumapit ako sa lugar ng nagsalitang mama at sinabi kong, “Sino ang nagsabi non? May prublema ba?”

Hindi sana siya kikibo, kaya lang nagtanong ulit ako at tinitignan siya ng mga katabi niya kaya napilitan siyang bumulong ng, “Hindi miss, wala lang yun.”

Sinabi kong, “May prublema ba kung pumunta ako sa gitna? Bakit bawal ba?”

Sinabi niyang, “Bakit ka ba nagagalit e hindi naman ikaw yun?”

Sinabi kong, “Hindi ako yun? E sabi mong, “O, paraanin ang maganda!”

Sinabi niyang, “Oo nga! Hindi nga ikaw yun!”

Sinabi kong, “Ah, hindi ako yun. Ako lang ang babae dito sa gitna, at ako lang ang babaeng dumaan sa likod mo. So nung sinabi mong “maganda” ano, ibig mong sabihin lalake?!”

Hindi siya nakasagot.

Sinabi kong, “Bago kayo magsalita, tignan niyo muna kung magmumukha kayong TANGA!”

Tatapusin ko tong post na ito sa salitang ingles. Wala lang. Parang mas matalinhaga lang kasi akong mag-english:

In our Philippine patriarchal culture, men usually get away with uncouth, abrasive and lecherous behaviour towards women and homosexuals. So I say cheers, and fuck you all very much.

P.S. Pramis magbabasa ako ng mas maraming Twin Hearts Romances para matuto ng mas malalim na wikang Filipino.

Nankurunaisa. Punyeta.

P.S. Last Na: 90th post ko na pala to. Nagsasabog ako ngayon ng confetti sa ibabaw ng ulo niyo. Imaginary lang siyempre, mahirap magwalis. Use your imagination.

Yes, thrown at you without preamble. You’re welcome.

This photo was taken with a Samsung Omnia Pro B7320 mobile phone and edited with Adobe Photoshop CS2. The camera I’m holding is Aglaia, my Nikon D90.

Boxes are made to be gotten out of. Stay passionate!

•••҉•••

There was once a king who desired to have the most powerful weapon in all the world. He made a decree stipulating that he would give a small part of his kingdom (which was massive hence making “small” quite large in turn) to the one who would be able to give him such weapon. People from all over came far and wide. Blacksmiths presented swords and spears and shields, claiming them to have immeasurable power. Potioners brought liquids and pills that they claim cures all disease, make one impervious to harm, or revive someone from the brink of death. Wise men professed themselves bearing secret wisdom that ensure success in every undertaking or make sure to multiply the king’s wealth. They made a long line from the palace that stretched to almost the outskirts of the capital city, waiting for their turn to present their treasures to the king.

The king, (for he did possess wisdom and is able to detect most treacheries) was growing tired of the things presented to him that are no more special than everyday items (most potioners balked openly when the king asked them to drink their potions to prove it’s effects. Some ran for it after drinking their Impervious Potion and seeing the king walking toward them with his sword). Angry, he made a decree proclaiming death to those unable to prove their treasure’s power upon presentation.

Almost all the people waiting hurriedly packed their belongings and made a dash towards the gates after hearing of the king’s wrath. Thinking that no one else will present anything to the king, the guards were closing the palace’s heavy doors when they heard a frail cry.

An old man, almost blind and leaning heavily on a staff, was trying to hurry towards the them. He told the guards, “Please let me in, I have something to present to the king.”

The guards, pitying the man, told him, “If you haven’t heard, the king is ordering death for people who are unable to prove the effectiveness of what is being presented to him.”

The old man said: “Death is but a passage that men fulfilled tread without regret.”

The guards, baffled at the old man’s statement, shrugged and assisted him to the hall where the king sat on his throne.

The king saw the old man, and with a voice dripping with cynicism said: “So old man, are you so near death’s door that you do not fear it? What foolishness will you present me now?”

The old man said, “I have come to present you with wisdom most people are taught but rarely remember.”

And he took out a big jeweled ring with a top not unlike a locket and held it out to the king.

The king said, “What use have I for common knowledge? And what is this you’re giving me? Pray do not waste my time for my patience is thin!”

The old man said, “This ring contains one of the most powerful weapons man has ever known. Wear this ring at all times, and only open it in time of grave danger.”

The king, incensed at the old man’s words, shouted, “So you think to hoodwink me with a promise of non-existent wisdom that I am to discover after you have been rewarded? Take back your words and leave, while I convince myself of your actions as an old man’s folly!”

The old man said calmly, “I have lived for a long time in this world; I have traveled far, have hurried to see things and chased many learning.  I have not long to live: I only request for a small servant’s cottage within your palace grounds, three meals a day and the services of a servant until I die. In exchange of this small amount of faith, I leave you with the greatest wisdom that I have ever acquired.”

The king looked at the ring, then at the old man. The old man is disheveled; his cloak is dusty and full of holes. His hair is long, gray and unkempt, his face as gnarled and rough as the hand that held out the ring. His  deeply lined eyes were looking at the king and has thin films of white over the irises.

The king remained still, then said, “Alright. Charity towards fools is charity nonetheless. I will accept the ring in exchange of your stipulations. However, if your wisdom does me harm or is useless when I use it in great danger, you will be dragged to the square and immediately beheaded.”

The old man bowed. He was led to the cottage and given a warm meal.

A year passed since the meeting of the king and old man. The king has worn the ring always thinking that no harm comes from assuming it contains wisdom. A coup has broken out led by his highest general, attacking the palace at a night of a full moon. He and his family had to flee from the palace. Outnumbered and being chased by the general’s troops, he sent his family with his men to run away while he made sure the general’s troops followed him.

Reaching the end of a dense forest and coming out to a small clearing which ended on a cliff ledge, he heard the distant hooves bearing down upon him. He was filled with despair knowing that his end is near. He covered his face with his hands and felt the ring the old man gave him. He hurriedly opened it. Inside contained a folded piece of parchment, which contained the words:

This too shall pass.

He paused and contemplated the words. As his mind realized this as truth peace filled his heart. Looking down the cliff, he was calmed by the knowledge that whatever happens next, be it hurt or terror will not last forever.

His mind cleared, he suddenly knew what to do. He came down his horse, faced it towards the general’s direction, and slapped it hard on its rump. The horse galloped away hard while he clambered up to the top of a high tree.

The general and his men came upon the cliff’s edge. Having seen the horse gallop away riderless, he proclaimed that the cowardly king has jumped to his death instead of facing him.

Once the general has turned back to claim the kingdom he now thought was his, the king came down the tree, went into hiding, gathered the men still loyal to him and took back the throne within a few weeks.

On his victory parade the people cheered and proclaimed of his greatness. The felt his chest swell with pride as his people looked at him with adoration. Wearing an arrogant smile, he was suddenly hit with a stunning realization like a splash of cold water on his face.

This too shall pass.

Humbled, he stopped the parade and knelt, thanking the men who remained loyal to him for the honor of being chosen.

The king learned most important lessons, which became his greatest weapons: hope during despair, and humility during triumph.

I am submitting photos to the Visual Storytellers Contest by Your Picture On Canvas. I was looking through the pictures I’ve taken so far this year and have chosen three that I feel speaks to the viewer. I noticed that they are all happy pictures without overt drama; instead telling stories of optimism and simplicity.

A grandma and her grandson, taken at Muñoz Market in Quezon City, Philippines

Picture of my cousin Eman, who's very happy after eating brownies.

How about you? What do you think of the pictures? Do leave tips and comments at the comments section.

Two of the past three Sundays (I pestered others on the third Sunday) I’ve been making my two dogs, grampa Mars (he turned 13 human years this year) and puppy Bugoy as my unwilling photography subjects. By unwilling I mean I made like a paparazzi taking their shots. Unfortunately, our other dog Kenji kind of goes nuts when you try to take his picture. Like jump on you while you’re holding an expensive camera nuts, so no pictures of him. Also he’s currently healing from a skin condition, so there’s that too.

To people who aren’t from the my neighborhood, the word “aspin” comes from the combined Filipino words “aso” meaning dog and “pinoy” meaning Filipino. Aspin is what we call the local (not to mention lovable and totally awesome) Philippine dog breed which are looked down upon by snotty breedists (what I call breed racists) who prefer imported dog breeds which will die if not fed Holistic and given Evian. I’m actually a breedist myself: I tend to look down on puny, expensive mice- er, dogs that are incapable of barking (they yelp) and will reach China when I kick them.

Choosing photos to put on this post, I found myself thinking of captions to some of the photos. Hence, the idea of the Aspin Chronicles was born! For my Facebook friends, they have already seen the captions, so it’ll be kind of repetitive. But that’s OK cause my captions are funny! Am I right? Right? High five? Please?

Also to digress before the pictures: If your goal is having a companion that will greet you everyday like it’s the first time they’ve seen you in five years, instead of shelling out a ton of money buying imported dogs that suffer in Philippine climate (which should be tagged as animal cruelty!), adopt from PAWS instead. You get healthy pets, at the same time you help PAWS help more animals living on the streets.

Mars: “And that, kiddo, is how you piss off your humans by pissing on their things.”
Bugoy: “Wow”

“Your pimple, it’s speaking to me in high pitched tones. I’m scared.”

“Shoot, Imma bite that SOB’s throat if he sings Delilah one more effing time.”

“green mango green mango green mango green mango”

“Does it look sexier when I cross my legs?”

“Hihihihi, I still can’t get over Kenji eating that newspaper after I told him I’d eat it if he didn’t. What a dumbass.”

“…green mango green mango green mango”

“Money first before I work with you.”

“There goes that creepy paparazzi lady again.”

“So sleepy…have to try…not to sleep…”

“Sigh, no more green mango, that darn paparazzi lady ate them all.”

Lazy Sunday morning. <3

Darn, even dogs are lazy during Sunday.

“Zzzzzzzz”

“Mom, just five more minutes, I’m eating a cat zzzzzz….”

Still sleeping…

“You’d BETTER not post this on facebook.”

“Dadadada-dah-dah! Schuperdooog!!”

As a bonus for getting to the bottom of the post, here’s me with Aglaia

source: zazzle.com

“From experience he has received bitter lessons, oh, infinitely more than the sweet lesson that his mother gave him, and nevertheless the man preserves the heart of a child and he believes that light is the most beautiful thing there is in creation and that it is worthy for a man to sacrifice his life for it.” -From “My First Reminiscence” by Gat Jose Rizal

Napanuod ko kasama ng pamilya ko ang “Pepe Rizal: Sa Isip, Sa Salita at Sa Gawa na itinanghal sa CCP Tanghalang Nicanor Abelardo. Never akong tumanggi kapag inaaya ako ng nanay ko manuod ng pagtatanghal sa teatro: pareho naming hilig, madalas libre ang tiket, libre ang pagkain (abusadong anak). Pero aaminin ko na noong nakita ko ang poster ng pagtatanghal, inisip kong mabu-buraot ako. Ang sabi kasi ng nanay ko tungkol raw ito sa buhay ni Rizal. Pumasok sa isip ko na kailangan ko sigurong magbaon ng tissue dahil sa talinhaga ng mga gagamiting salita ng mga aktor.

Ang pagtatanghal ay binubuo ng iba’t ibang parte at iba’t ibang grupo ng mga artista, ballet dancers, folk dancers at singers. Kumuha sila ng ilang excerpt mula sa iba’t ibang obra ni Rizal at ginawang inspirasyon sa kanilang naging performance. Natutunan ko nung gabing iyon na “Never judge a feature by it’s poster, for it is not a book”. Kung papipiliin ako kung alin ang gugustuhin kong mapanuod muli, ang Cats na sikat na sikat sa Broadway, o ang pagtatanghal na iyon, walang pagi-imbot na iyon ang pipiliin ko, at hindi dahil sa biased ako. Ika nga ng pinsan kong si Jelleen Vinluan noong matapos ang palabas, “Kinilabutan ako.”

Hati man sa maraming parte ang pagtatanghal ay iisa ang nanaig na tanong sa buong palabas: ano si Rizal sa atin? Sa tingin ba nang karamihan sa atin ay makabuluhan pa ba sa ngayon ang mga pananaw niya noong kapanahunan niya?

Uso pa ba ang maging makabayan?

Kung matatawag mong makabayan ang pag-suot ng t-shirt na may mukha ni Rizal na naka-shades, o kaya damit na may mukha ni Ninoy at Cory, aba’y oo. At pwede rin sigurong masabing makabayan ang paglalagay ng tato ng Three Stars and a Sun sa mabuhok na likod na parang si idol Francis M.

“Ang mamatay ng dahil sayo.”

Yan ang huling kataga sa ating pambansang awit. Tuwing inaawit ko ang katagang ito ay talagang napapalakas ang aking pagkanta. Napakasarap naman kasi sa puso ang idea na maghahamon ka ng away kapag may nagtangkang umapi sa bayan mo.

Sabi ng iba, nagiging nasyonalistik na raw ang mga Pilipino ngayon. Makabayan nga ba talaga tayo 150 na taon ang nakakalipas mula nang isilang si Gat Jose Rizal?

Tinignan ko ang paligid ko.

Andaming batang pulubi. Ang rungis ng kalsada. Nakakatakot lumakad sa village kahit anong oras, kasi baka ma-hablot yung bag mo ng lalaking nasa motorsiklo. Lahat hindi pwedeng maunahan at hindi pwedeng magbigay. Puro palusot, puro kabig. Nakatapat lagi ang salamin sa mukha ng iba. Walang respeto sa babae’t matatanda. Nakikialam ang simbahan sa gobyerno.

Putsa, hindi na nga tayo inaapi ng mga tamad na kastila, pero tayo mismo ang umaapi sa ating mga sarili.

Ang hirap isipin na kung mabubuhay muli si Rizal ngayon at makikita niya ang lagay ng bansa, ang mararamdaman niya marahil ay dismaya.

Ang daling magsuot ng dilaw at sabihin na mamamatay ka para sa bayan mo pero itatapon mo parin sa eskeleytor ng MRT yang supot na pinagkainan mo ng donut.

Marahil ang kailangan nating lahat ay ang maging panibagong makabayan. Isinasaisip ang leksyon ng nakaraan habang pinagbubuti ang kasalukuyan. Pinagbubuti sa sarili at nagiging magandang ehemplo ng tama sa mga bata. Tumatanggap ng pagkakamali. Umaako ng responsibilidad at hindi umaasa sa gobyerno. May respeto sa sarili kaya’t may respeto sa iba. May pakialam sa bayan at inaalam ang mga pangyayari upang hindi ma-goyo sa eleksyon.

Tama na ang pagiging pabigat, pala-asa, mapanisi, mapanira, mapagsa-walang bahala at makapal ang mukha. Tama na ang pagiging mapang-abuso at mapagpapairal ng ganid. Gawin talaga natin kapag sinabi natin ang mga salitang “Mabuhay tayo.”

Madaling sabihin, kayang gawin.

P.S., Maraming maraming salamat kay Ms. Cora of Brasserie 21 sa tiket at sa napakasarap at nakakabusog na cocktail food (Kahit hindi naman talaga dapat nakakabusog ang cocktail. Panalo ang pritchon!!!). Bisitahin niyo ang resto nila sa 21st Floor ng Security Bank Building sa Ayala Ave., Makati.

The waves of the dance that entice and

Tease yet repel when you close the distance.

Soft heat that caress your face as if asking

For forgiveness.

Only the ones you love hurt you the most and

I understand and I accept and I’ll

Feed anything, everything as long as

The amber curls never stop moving

For me.

I thought about doing the second one in monochrome too.

There are times, in life that remind us that what we have right now could be temporary whether it be good or bad. Altogether it’s never a bad idea to be happy whatever the circumstances are

This is my second panorama from the pictures I took during my short vacation in Singapore. You’ll find the first one here.

My friend, BaonKoBento’s Pat The Sexy (click on the link. dooooo it) suggested that I do a step by step guide on how I edited panoramas in Adobe Photoshop. [Side note: I currently use Adobe CS2 at home and I use CS4 at the office.] Not to be told as having illusions of grandeur or such: I am an amateur someone self-studying Photoshop. When stumped, I get my tips from the web and helpful co-workers. I was thinking of doing this post as a guide, but I had a tougher time editing this one so it wouldn’t be a good example.

The raw pictures are below:

If you will notice, the second picture is tilted. also, the color and picture contrast/levels difference with the first one was a pain in the arse. Aside from all I did in the previous one (manually connecting and editing out points, matching color and levels) I had to cut undesired portions, tilt both pictures in, merge and crop the workable portion. Below is the finished product. I hope you like it! If you don’t well…ppffftt! (and yes, that is a Hot Fuzz reference)

This time, instead of asking you nicely, I will hypnotize you into clicking the image:

You! Look into my eyes... Oh wait.

I’m going back to sleep for an hour. Have a good weekend everyone!

Taken with Samsung Omnia Pro B7320 mobile phone.

1. No more unplanned spending: set goals for your money to make it easier to save
2. Health comes first: when your tooth aches, don’t wait
3. Multivitamins are a must
4. If possible, eat a serving of fruit everyday. Pineapples are yummy
5. Exercise at least once a week

I see now that it’s not a matter of hoping that I stay with the changes, but rather determining to focus until they become habits.

By the way, I’m using the WordPress app. I give it 3 out of five stars.

To my few readers: sorry for using my blog for this. I do hope you read more of my upcoming posts.